my heart is breaking

can you hear the smashing when you pound on it with unspoken words?
can you hear it scream with you drill in the pain?

i dont know why im still here with you
i dont why i proclaim so loudly that you re my one and only.
this lie
this deceit
i had enough

i want what you cant provide
i want things more than you cant imagine

you pushed me over the cliff
you ran me over time and time again with your car
you forced me into a corner i cant fathom.

now im lost
in the woods,
in your eyes,
in your heart.

i cant seem to find the way out,
cant seem to find my bread crumbs i threw just for this reason.

this emotion was felt.
as i sat alone, along a corridor, trying to find a space that fits.
i couldnt.
at that moment,
i just wanted to run into the next available person's arms, thinking that i could find some solitude.
i almost bursted out into tears,
almost cried rivers like before.

but no, i cant let it happen again, cant cry for a person who s showing me a different definition of pain.

she said , i misunderstood a lot of her actions.
maybe i did.
maybe i had too much time thus leadin me to make assumptions.
"assumptions are the root of all fucked - up problems."

alvina
maybe you could take away this.